we were talking a bunch about werepeople last night or as i like to call them reverse-werewolves. but really it makes more sense to call them werepeople. so do that. but know i’m THINKING reverse werewolf when i say wereperson.
Ok so they’re wolves right, who are humans three days out of the year. Pretty straightforward. probably included a hilarious scene at the beginning of a wolf getting bit by a person. who knows.
And so you take the werewolf trope of a person waking up in the morning like in the forest all dirty and naked and stuff and like WHAT DID I DO LAST NIGHT but instead it’s a WOLF waking up like in a hat next to a briefcase or something like WHAT DID I DO ALL DAY. Like hastiy burying a pair of pants so nobody finds out that he’s a MONSTER.
And then we were thinking ok well what does the wereperson do all day. what’s a terrifying human… OH IT’S LIKE A WALL STREET GUY. just acting on his wereperson instincts, not aware of his true wolf nature. you know all the other people at the wall street are like who is this incredible trader (?) who shows up rocking the fuck out of stocks and shit but only three days a month. WHY DON’T WE KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT HIM HE’S SO MYSTERIOUS.
MEANWHILE the wolves are like something really dangerous has happened to this wolf, it could be bad for all of us. we’ve got to kill him for the good of us all. but his best wolf friend is like NO HE’S ONE OF US WE HAVE TO BE UNDERSTNADING. And all the wolves are like no we have to get him and we have to get him when he’s human. but the friend wolf runs ahead to try and warn him and like runs onto the trading floor and everyone’s like WHAT THE FUCK WHY IS THERE A WOLF HERE. and our wereperson is like oh no a wolf… but also.. a strange sense of recognition. what’s going on. and his wolf friend is trying to warn him and then suddenly the security guard is like i have to shoot this wolf and the wereperson just whips his head around and GROWLS. and suddenly it’s like whoa I KNOW WHO I AM!?
and then they run off and the last scene is like some variation of like you know when a werewolf is like i have accepted that i am both person and wolf and now i’m a person but i’m running through the forest or whatever. it’s like… the wereperson as a wolf curling up in his cave on like a nice suit or something. knowing that when the change comes he’ll be ready.
wereperson the movie.
God I can’t stop laughing. I also like to imagine the final scene as like, a bunch of werepeople who have found each other (they call themselves a support group, people keep wanting to call them a pack but it makes them uncomfortable) doing human stuff together, like going for sushi or playing raquetball. But in a way that indicates they’ve accepted themselves and feels really meaningful. BUT a shot of a wolf with a rolling rack of human clothes and he’s like, sniffing them and nodding happily to himself, would also be great.
Or maybe he could quit being a Wall Street guy and get a job working for Greenpeace?
I just like to imagine a wolf looking at like, a record of a hostile takeover, and he has no recollection of where it came from, and he’s like WHAT HAVE I DONE?